A Solo Traveler's Illustration: Breakdowns while Abroad Lead to Breakthroughs- Ginuine Gemini takes London!
A Solo Traveler Illustration
“You sure you can handle this 10 Hour flight alone?”
My Mother asked me that question a thousand times. My 4th solo trip was about to happen, and I couldn’t be more excited. Neither of my Parents were comfortable with me traveling alone. This trip would be the longest to date. My heart was open, my mind was clear, I was ready to embrace the beauty that is the United Kingdom.
As a newly divorced Woman the idea of freedom is painted differently for me. I enjoy impromptu experiences opposed to planned and structured ones. In my marriage, I always wanted every experience planned. It helped me keep control over our joy, or so I thought. As I transitioned into Singledom, I quickly started to understand how opposite my actions were.
10 hours later, Flight 8572 landed in London. Overwhelmed is the perfect word to explain my emotions. No plans, no purpose, just a passion for peace. I was exhausted. My flight was amazing, it just took a toll on my body. The time difference from California to London is 8 hours, so my brain was up, but my body was not. London has a different energy, an energy that is hard to put into words. I arrived just before sunset, and was amazed with how gorgeous this Country was. The smell, the views, the lights, the funny feeling of seeing people drive on the opposite side, it was all so refreshing. There is limited pressure as a solo traveler. You march to the beat of your own drum. First day in London, and I literally just wanted to sit in my Hotel room. Kind of boring right? Not for me, I had a ball. This is what these experiences do for me, they help elevate my mind with discovery of self. While I surely wanted to capitalize on every moment, it was ok to do nothing.
Day 2 began very upbeat and full of promise. Foreign breakfast items awaited me downstairs in the Hotel. The fresh dew of London’s Mother Nature pierced its way through the town. Everything was magical. That suddenly shifted. Sadness consumed me. As I traveled to my first Tourist Attraction, this energy overpowered my peace. Traveling alone has never made me sad. In fact, its brought me the most joy. The uncertainty of this energy truly aggravated my heart. Why? Why are you suddenly feeling empty? Nothing surrounding me was triggering. Nothing made me feel pain, so why? I fought it. Smiled through tears, and stayed focus on being adventurous. Feeling very fraudulent, and untrue, I had to do something. In the midst of Tourist chaos, I decided to find a quiet area and pray. I needed some extra strength. I prayed quietly in a cute Coffee Shop. After praying, I wrote in my prayer book, and just begged God to remove the dark energy consuming me. In the Coffee Shop I noticed several families, couples, and friends, enjoying each other. That’s when it hit me. These experiences shouldn’t be for my eyes only. I wanted my Family, my Friends, and future Soul Mate to indulge in this also. So where was the disconnect? Why this particular trip? God chooses when and how he teaches his lessons. It’s ok to be confident in your Singledom, and suddenly get hit with harsh realities. What makes this beautiful? What you do in that moment. Making a choice to still want peace, and not dive deeper into potential depression. Being an advocate for yourself and pushing through difficult times, while loving on yourself constantly is a full time job.
After shedding a few tears and calling my Parents, my 4th solo trip continued without a hitch. It’s important to realize peace requires work. You can be the happiest, be comfortable financially, and still have breakdowns. Use them as breakthroughs. London was so beautiful and amazing. It was a perfect place to have my breakdown. Keep doing the work required for your peace.
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